>Not A Great Day

>Didn’t sleep well last night due to leg pain, so dozed on couch and watched tv most of the day. I’m going to see if I can renegotiate my cable package to get back the science channel and nat geo. There is nothing on tv during the day worth watching. I did watch Countdown and Rachel Maddow last night where they had clips from the Pres. talking to the Republicans. The man is freaking brilliant. He can call up facts like Clinton, but even better, he just nails them with the half-truths and out-right lies they try to foist on their sheep…er, followers…out in the heartland. Probably none of them watched it, though. Like I won’t watch Bill O’ or Beck or Fox News. One thing about Fox News though, I do like Shepard Smith. He seems to not just spout the party line all the time, at least the few times I’ve caught a bit of his show. I thought he did a really excellent job during the whole 9/11 crises and have checked him out off and on ever since. So one good thing about Fox News. I’ve also met and conversed with Carl Cameron, who I’m not sure is still on Fox. Smart and articulate guy. Who’d a thought I’d have good things to say about Fox News?

It’s winter. It’s cold. I’m grouchy and I am feeling yet again so freaking tired of feeling like I’ve been hit by a truck. Can somebody please fix me? Please?

>Holocaust Remembrance Day



Whenever I am reminded of this, of Bosnia, of Rwanda, it always makes me think: Those who did these terrible things were people just like me, people with mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers. If they are capable of inflicting such horrors onto others, would I be capable of doing the same in the same circumstances? Would I forget my humanity just as easily as they did? Could I turn into a monster, too? Buddhism teaches ‘right’ living, thinking, working. ‘Right’ meaning in a way that does no harm to oneself or others. (Link below) Would I be able to remember that? Would I be able to live that? These thoughts and ideas scare me. That I could be one of those people who could/would commit such atrocities on my fellow humans. I think that is why it is important to never forget these things happened. Because they can just as easily happen again, and in fact, are happening in various places around the world right now. I am shamed by this, and by my inability to do anything to stop it.


I see I have lost a follower. Not everyone can agree with my positions, I understand that. I have been angry with the world recently, and it has shown in this blog. Less about being ill, more about political and religious ideas. Rather than ceasing to follow, it would be good if people would comment with their own ideas, whether it is disagreeing with me, agreeing with me, or providing a completely different point of view. I am not close-minded, I am just opinionated. I like hearing other points of view, I like debate, I like learning, even if it means I learn I am wrong. Speak up people. I know you’re out there.


I’ve decided to just be completely over politics. It gives me seizures.

Here’s a list by by Frank Lipman that was posted on a blog I just discovered.



List: 20 New Year Resolutions

1. More Real Food, Less “Food-like Substances”,
2. More Fruit and Vegetables, Less Sugar, Wheat and Corn
3. More Organic, Less Toxic
4. More Chewing, Less Eating
5. More Water, Less Soda
6. More Recycling, Less Waste
7. More Walking, Less Driving
8. More Exercising, Less Watching TV
9. More Outdoors, Less Indoors
10. More Sleep, Less Worry
11. More Calm, Less Chaos
12. More Being, Less Doing
13. More Consciousness, Less Ignorance
14. More Smiles, Less Anger
15. More Love, Less Hatred
16. More Play, Less Serious
17. More Letting Go, Less Holding On
18. More Forgiving, Less Blaming
19. More Generosity, Less Greed
20. More Ubuntu, Less Me!

Ubuntu means what makes us human is the humanity we show each other. It is a Xhosa (South African) word and philosophy emphasizing community, sharing and generosity.


>I haz it. Scott Brown won the election. His will be the vote that takes down the dream of his predecessor in the Senate, Ted Kennedy. He wanted the seat to destroy what Kennedy worked so hard for, and not enough of us who support health care reform got out and did their civic duty. This is what always happens. People think it doesn’t make a difference if they vote, but it does. So we will get what we deserve. We didn’t learn from those eight years? Apparently not. I saw an ad that said how close we are to having Washington decide our health care. Who do they think decides it now? Drug companies and HMO’s, that’s who. We are a stupid lot in this country. It’s just too darn bad.


>I posted this in reply to a comment in a group I belong to, and I thought the subject important enough to repost here. Yes, it political, people, but politics really do matter to all of us.

“But if you vote for the independent, it takes votes away from Martha, and Scott wins. Remember this happened when Ralph Nader ran. The election went a way it might not have gone otherwise. Who wins matters. A certain interest group has hijacked the government, mainly because people who don’t share their philosophy don’t get out and vote, and people who do, do. So they got in and look where it took us. Yes, people, I am one of those left-wing liberal tree-huggers, and proud of it. Way back in the early 90’s, PBS did a show about Ralph Reed and his group. He later became a close advisor to Bush the Second. It struck me, watching the show, that A. he was scary, and B. just a little more fanaticism on his part, and he could start a Jihad of his own against those of us who don’t share his views. And in a way, he did. We have devolved into a country where if those of us on one side don’t like what those of us on the other side say, they don’t just disagree with us, they hate us. Now we have Rush and Glenn and Bill O’ spewing hate every day in every way. I personally find this very, very scary. We worry about certain factions of the Muslim faith, but we should also worry about certain factions of the Christian faith, who apparently have no idea or just don’t care what Jesus actually taught. Don’t mean to start something here, but this really matters, people. Really. What kind of America do you want your children to live in?”

>It Was A Sucky Day

My computer is still acting up and I cannot figure it out. Getting frustrated. Has anyone ever done a re-install? It’s all pretty backed up on MozyHome and XMarks, so I think I could do it, just not sure if it’s wise. I’d want to update the drivers and then just reinstall stuff I know I will really use. Sheldon just did it on The Big Bang Theory, and it took a very long time. Long enough for him to try to learn the Finnish language. I like The Big Bang Theory. I can get on-line without the desktop, but just not sure if I should attempt this or not.

The second sucky thing is the comments made by two complete and total fuck-ups about the horrific earthquake in Haiti. Pat Robertson and Rush Limbaugh. Two people I would not ever think of listening to, but they do get themselves onto Keith Olbemann and Rachel Maddow, The Daily Show and the Colbert Report, all of which I do check out. Disgraceful comments by two hate-filled right-wing bigots. They make me ashamed.

The last is that a bad thing happened to someone I love, and I am very upset by it and by the fact that there is really nothing I can do to help or make it better. I can just sit here and think evil thoughts about the person who did it. People can be such complete and utter shits. These three really do suck and it really is sad.

>Just Another Sunday

Computer kept freezing up, no idea why. Finally working now.

New Chuck. Yes! And more tomorrow night. I do like Chuck.

Watching “The Plan” about Galactica. So so, so far.

It is cold. 15 degrees fahrenheit, supposed to get down to 8. Did I move to Siberia and forgot about it?

Finally had a decent night’s sleep last night, and then fell asleep on the couch this afternoon for about two hours. I wish I could get this sleep thing figured out, but after this long, it’s not looking good. How do other people with this illness do it? Anyone?

Spent about an hour rubbing Gertrude’s tummy earlier. She is back to skittish and hiding most of the time, but she curled up next to me while I was reading fan fiction on the netbook, and let me rub her tummy. She really loves that, but is usually just too nervous. Poor thing. Maybe she needs tranquilizers.

That’s about it. It’s freezing cold, dreary, let’s go into hibernation winter. Not much excitment.

>Those Links

I did a quick scroll back through and listed the ones that still need fixing. Once they’re done, if you ever get curious (for curious read ‘desperate for something to do’) and read back, you’ll see that my life is a roller-coaster. Pain, no pain: I cooked, I can’t cook: the black hole is circling, I feel great; my brain is working, “What was I just talking about?”; sleeping fine, can’t sleep. It’s a never-ending rotation with this illness. It’s kind of good to look back and see that whatever is going on at the moment has more than likely gone on before and will change to something else soon. Not so great if what’s going on is good, eagerly awaiting change if what’s going on is pain and sleeplessness and black hole-circling. Live in the moment is my mantra. It’s the only way to get through it, and I’ve found over time that I’m actually much happier over-all through living in the moment. Much less stress and pressure. Something to keep in mind.


Thanks to Elizabeth in Ontario, who pointed out the little green icon in the blogger tool bar, I have now fixed several links. “Follows directions well” does NOT belong on my resume. I could have even coded them myself, I can do html coding. Do I feel stupid? Nah. Well, maybe just a little bit.

Yes, I am a bad person, but there is no offense intended to those of you who take homeopatic items. I just think this is funny:

Homeopathy Explained

Last bit: NPH won ‘Gay Man of the Decade’ over John Barrowman. It was to be expected. He has a load of twitter followers, and John…not so many. It was a fun contest, and they both deserve accolades for class and humor. But John should have won.



(Wrote this last night. Computer decides it’s time to go to bed, so here it is now.)

I tried to do some. Where I could put in the actual vid instead of the link, I did. I hate having to copy and paste a link, but I cannot figure out why the ones on here are not clickable. It annoys me as much as it must annoy my readers, and I am sorry I cannot figure it out. If anyone out there knows how, I’d appreciate a heads-up.

Had a good day. Homemaker, friend came over, and I actually cooked dinner for myself. Was going to watch tv tonight, but sometime into NCIS friend called for pc help. So I just decided to wait for On Demand. Both NCISs are on it, and The Good Wife is too, I think. I’m not devoted to any of these except for the original NCIS—-McGee Is The Man—-so it’s no big deal. I find myself watching less and less tv every week. Sometimes I don’t even turn it on to see if there’s anything on I WANT to watch. I’ve totally bailed on shows I used to watch religiously. I just get bored when the commercial comes on and shut it down. No attention span, or too many commercial breaks? You decide. LOL


>That’s right, bollocks! Funk all gone, btw. Thanks for asking. Back to the bollocks.

Been reading a lot of comments about the unbelievably crass and insulting ‘gift’ that RTD gave to our Jack in the final Doctor Ten. Some people are actually okay with it. Some are not. I am in the latter camp. Russell Davies is an amazing writer, if you just don’t pay attention. If you do, you cannot help but notice all the plot holes, the sudden personality changes, the complete manipulation of characters to suit his own whim of the moment. He said in one con interview, in response to a fan, “MY show.” He can do what he wants and the fans don’t matter. Really? Without fans, can there be a show? He said in another interview, that in “They Keep Killing Suzie” the whole point of the episode was to get the two women in the car, presumably to talk about his idea of the afterlife, or lack of one. Not about the characters, not about the show, but about something he wanted to say to the world. Fine. That’s what authors do. But then he destroyed most of his characters. He killed Suzie, Tosh, Owen, Ianto, and he destroyed Jack, right after completely changing him into an idiot. “Lets go yell at the aliens, Ianto. That will fix things.” Dealing with aliens is Jack’s JOB. I know, I keep saying this, maybe not in this place, but I do. In a sit-com, a situation is conceived, and the characters are put into it. The characters are not changed to fit the situation, or the message the author wants to get across. The characters remain true to themselves. This is where Russell falls down. The characters don’t matter to him. Only the situation and the message. The audience doesn’t matter to him either. See quote above. He did actually say at one point words to the effect that fans don’t matter. Logic and continuity don’t matter either, apparently. Jack was an over-sexed narcissist. Yes, he was. But Jack was also a very, very broken man. He had lost everything and everyone he loved. He was tortured, he was killed countless times, he was condemned by his own brother to be buried for two thousand years, dying and reviving over and over again. It’s a miracle he had any sanity left. But he did. The story led us to believe that he did. The story led us to believe that he let down his walls, however reluctantly, just enough to let Ianto in. He allowed himself to love Ianto. Right up to the moment Russell decided Ianto was expendable to Big Dramatic Effect and Jack could just get over it. Because people, love, feelings are only there to be manipulated and crushed. Doctor Who, if you payed attention, is all about loss and pain and regret. I thought it was a children’s show. Anyway, all this death and loss and horror and killing his own grandson left us with broken, destroyed, dead-inside Jack. Here we are six months later. Russell has such respect for his characters that he completely ignores things he’s written about them in previous eps. Donna will die if she remembers the doctor. Donna remembers and lives. Martha leaves to marry Tom. Oh, wait. Martha is married to Mickey. Then, as the final insult, he turns the Doctor into a pimp who ‘gifts’ Jack with a new boyfriend, mainly because he hearts the actor playing the new boyfriend, and with such respect for his character and audience, has Jack just give his big smirk and leer and Ianto, and Tosh, and Owen, and Suzie, and his grandson are all forgotten. It’s all better now Jack, because you have a new shag. The man (Russell T. Davies)is an unbelievable twat. He makes me so aaarrrrgggggghhhhhhhh. And I didn’t even get into the whole ‘Gwen’ issue. Because then I’d have to shoot my computer. Oh, I feel better now. Thank you.

>I am such a loser

In such a funk, posted about it, thought it was maybe too harsh, deleted post. It had been twittered already. Here’s the link from the post, for anyone who’s interested:


Being in a funk gets me thinking about things that bother me, and the above is one of them. The things people do in the name of religion just astound and quite frequently disgust, appall, and downright scare me. Ask yourself, what did the icon of your particular religion actually teach, and what was added to that teaching by people who were serving their own needs? A couple of good books I’ve read over the years were ‘Jews, God, and History’ by Max I. Dimont, and ‘What Jesus Taught’. I don’t know the author of the last one.

One thing I said in the deleted post was about buddhism. There are a couple of things in the article about it. One says it is a faith-based religion. It is not. One says it refers to animals as lesser beings, which is only in sects that have imposed the idea of reincarnation on the teachings of the buddha. The buddha did not teach religion, he taught a way of living based on your own knowledge and experience and the evidence in front of you. Basically, it’s about living in a way that causes no harm to yourself or any other sentient being, or the planet. It had nothing to do with god or gods in any form. Just so you know. I urge you to read about it, if you are interested. I have mentioned some good books in my profile.

I don’t like deleting posts, this was only the second one. Both were the result of me being in a foul mood and then reflecting on whether I should put that out there and deciding against. But you know, it’s my blog, and I guess if I wish to write about my foul mood, you don’t have to read it if you don’t like it. I don’t know. I don’t like putting people off, but at the same time, this is blog is about me, with all my faults as well as anything good I may have to offer. Maybe I’m just sick of being sick and having pain and not getting out of here on any kind of regular basis. It’s up to you, readers, if you want to stick with grouch me or not.