I think I’ve figured out the biggest hazard of having surgery. You could die of exhaustion from all the pre-op stuff you have to do. Go to doctor. Go to hospital for three hours of x-rays and tests. Go to other doctor for pre-op clearance. Go BACK to hospital for follow-up blood work to make sure potassium supplements are working. Stay up all night to be awake for the crack of ‘omg who makes appointments for 6:15am anyway?’ check in for the actual surgery. I still have the last two on my to-do list, and I am already totally worn-out from all the activity. Can’t wait for it to be done and me back home with Gertrude.


I am exhausted today. Even though I was wheelchaired around yesterday, there was still a lot more standing and hobbling than I am used to lately. Did not want to get out of bed, but here I am, up, dressed, the whole nine yards,. Why do we say ‘the whole nine yards’? anyway.

Today’s prompt is the dedicate a song to my condition. Here’s the first one that came to mind:

A Good Day

So I was at the hospital for about three hours today, having x-rays and blood work, etc, Turns out my potassium levels are LOW so I am to start on a supplement ASAP. It was kind of fun. I got pushed around in a wheel chair by various nice people, since I cannot walk any distance, even with the walker. I can stand, apparently, since I had to for some of the x-rays. Had fun with my friend Tess afterwards. She drove me to and from. She has been without landline and internet since Thursday, since Verizon cannot seem to fix anything in a timely manner. A wire was down up the street and they sent a guy to pick it up, but not one to fix it. Every day, they tell her the guy is coming, every day he is a no-show. At least she got to check her email here today.

Tomorrow is my homemaker day, and my friend Beth is coming for a visit, and Tess is coming over again as well. I’m up for fun. Yes. Yes I am. LOL


Wow. I was really tired yesterday, a whole day after my appointment with the orthopedist. In bed by 11pm, got up at 4pm today. I can also stay awake for days at a time. Interesting? Well, maybe not.

I am hobbling a bit better, and can walk without the cane or walker when I first get up, but only briefly. I will need surgery, however. Oh, joy.

I had the windows open a bit yesterday and overnight, and tonight it is in the 30’s and windy. Not much going in when you sleep all day, but my friend Beth is coming for a visit Tuesday and that will be fun. Really looking forward to it. Haven’t seen her in awhile due to my stupid fibro issues. I’m actually just looking forward to everything, I think. Feeling very positive and energetic mentally, and want to DO something. Don’t know what, but something. That’s it for today.

Thinky Thoughts

Good morning. It is not even 8am and I am up, dressed, and ready to go to the orthopedist. Yay, me. Last night I was finalizing plans with Tess and I suggested we go to breakfast after. Seriously, folks. I can barely hobble along, how am I supposed to go to breakfast? Did not occur to me til later. This got me thinking.

I forget that I am ill. I forget that I can barely hobble along at the moment. As a general rule, I do not think about being ill or whatever problem I’m having physically at the moment. Sure, there are times it all gets me down, but usually I just chug along going with the flow and forget. I kind of think that’s a good thing. I’m not my illness, I’m a person with some limitations, yes, but I’m a person, not an illness. I kind of think it’s a good thing.

I’m no good at following the prompts. So far, most of them just didn’t inspire me. Guess this is the wrong kind of blog for that. Yesterday, my friend Tess brought me some food (food, it’s a good thing) and a walker. It makes it slightly easier to get around, because the balance problem of just using a cane is solved, but it doesn’t help with the pain, so I am still only getting up when absolutely necessary. Which is only a couple of times a day. I did sleep in the bed last night, instead of on the couch. It was wonderful. I should say, though, that even though I went to bed around 2am I think, I had had a medium coffee around 3pm when Tess came over, and so didn’t get to sleep until it was light out. Good think I like reading. Woke up at the new 5:15 or so.

I do wish they’d do away with daylight savings time. It’s harder in spring, bet even so, it takes at least a week to adjust. Even if you’re not sick.

Tomorrow I am calling around to find a new doctor so I can get this knee thing taken care of. Being immobile is quite scary, when you think about it. I’ve had almost a week of it, and I do not want to continue. In a way, it’s a wake up call to try to do more to get more mobile in general, and regain some of the independence I’ve lost since becoming ill.

I don’t like having to depend on other people. I know my friends are ready and willing to offer any help I may need, but I’d rather not need it in the first place. So I will try harder than I have been. Things were really hard for awhile, and I sort of just stopped doing things because of it. I used to use Dial-A-Ride, a service that takes you to appointments and such and picks you up after, but I had some bad experiences with not being picked up after for whatever reason they had, and it kind of put me off using it at all. Stress and having to walk some distance to find assistance takes a long time to recover from with fibro/cfs. Do not want to go through that again.

Not much else to say, so night all.

Oh, Well

Totally missed posting yesterday. Slept most of the day anyway.

Today’s prompt is ‘Five Things That Changed My Life’.

Moving to New England. Being 2,000 miles from my family and not having to be involved in the daily chaos allowed me to focus on my own husband and children rather than things I really couldn’t change anyway.

Meeting my friends Beth and Tess. They are the best friends anyone could ever ask for, and I am so fortunate to know each of then, Beth for 35 years, Tess for ten, I think.

Being hospitalized after my husband left. I learned that I am not that worthless person he made me believe I was, I have the ability to help other people feel better, to make people laugh. I learned that people actually like me. It was a revelation, being there.

Getting my job in the group home. Using my experiences to help those teenage girls who were having really hard times in life. Making them laugh, diffusing anger, helping them figure things out. The best job ever. I still miss it more than ten years later.

Getting sick. Had to leave that job, had to move, my world decreasing over time until it is me here in my apartment with my cat, seeing friends occasionally, and almost never going out.

Some life-changing events were devastating when they happened, but on the whole, my basic idea that good comes out of everything has been proven true. My husband left, I found a new career. I got sick, but it turns out my life is happier than it ever was before. You play the hand you’re dealt, with as much grace as you can muster, and in spite of the occasional melt-down, life is pretty darn good. You just have to notice the good things and stop focusing on the bad. It really is possible, and so worth the effort.


Almost missed posting today. Slept til 2:15 then just played on laptop and watched a bit of tv. Googled the knee thing, and I apparently need to see a doctor. A house call would be good, since how am I supposed to get to a doctor if I can’t walk. Tess is bringing over a walker tomorrow, so maybe that will help, and I may go to the emergency room. There’s always something. Other than the knee thing, I feel fine. Go figure.

Trees (Again)

See the tall tree behind the pole? Gone. Lost to the storm, apparently. I noticed a couple of days after the storm.

Using my own prompt today, which is just write whatever comes out. Can still barely walk, although I did manage to take a shower….very carefully. I thought if I killed myself in it, at least I’d be clean, right? I slept on the couch all day after being awake on the couch all night. The couch is my new home, I guess. I had crackers and carrots for dinner, since they were already here on the end table. Feeding treats to Gertrude, but am going to try to make it to the kitchen in a bit so I can put out some real food for her. This living alone thing gets a bit hairy when you are pretty immobile. Someone please feed me, make me some coffee, bring me some water and my pain pills. No? Well crap!

Did kind of lose it this morning. I could hear a chainsaw for quite a long time, and I just know they were cutting down some of the flowering pears on main street. I can’t see from here, though. They did put some bracing ties on two of the trees across the street, though, Did some trimming, too. But I was getting really upset about the trees, when I realized I was obsessing about trees because I am scared and upset about not being able to walk. I have really good repression skills, so it would seem. I mean, I’m just here. On my own. What happens to me if it gets worse, not better? Can’t let myself think about it, so trees it is. Works for me.

Blogging in November

I was invited to join a post-a-day from here:


There is a prompt for every day. Here is the first one:

Titles of my future book.

My future book? What would I call it?

1. Chronic Illness Doesn’t Mean You Can’t Enjoy Your Life.

2. Attitude: It Makes All The Difference When You Are Ill.

3. You Are Not Your Illness.

4. Why Yes, My Life IS A Soap Opera.

5. Self-Pity Does Not Change Anything.

How’s that? I had a good day today, in spite of not really being able to walk due to really painful pain in my knee. On the other hand, nothing else hurts for a change. It all moved to my knee. Luckily for me, today was my homemaker day, so she bought easy-eat no-prep foods, washed my baby carrots, brought everything to where I am ensconced on the couch with the laptop and remote, hung the laundry on the drying rack, and put out plenty of food for Gertrude. I love my homemaker. We also had a lovely chat with lots of laughing.

After she left, my friend Tess came over with COFFEE. Yes! We played a couple of games on the laptop with more laughing. Now I’m just watching local news with Gertrude, eating my carrots and a banana and organic cheese puffs. I am an ‘open box, eat contents’ person most of the time. I do eat fruit, avocados and mangoes among other things. Bananas are my favorite fruit.

Hey, that was a pretty good post for me. Especially since I’m tired, and didn’t think I’d be able to come up with anything to write. Yay, me.