7: do you name your plants?

No.  They come with names.  Spider plant aka chlorophytum comosum, for example.  I don’t talk to them either.

Went out today.  Took the Comcast modem, etc., to UPS to be returned.  Christmas tree shop for things I didn’t know existed or that I needed when I found out.  My fav kind of shopping.  Lots of pain in spite of two ibuprofens, but had fun anyway.  Muggy, muggy day, but today the a/c decided to work, unlike the first time I turned it on, so not icky in here.  Very tired, very much missing Gertrude.  Oh, well.  Life goes on, right?  She is not suffering, so that’s a good thing.  I would not want her to be suffering.  2017-04-24 09.02.29

6: do you keep plants?

I have spider plants, which Gertrude liked to eat so kept them where she couldn’t get at them.  I have a Christmas cactus that Traci, my old homemaker, gave me.  It’s also where Gertrude couldn’t get at it.  It occurred to me yesterday that I don’t need to keep them out of reach anymore.

It’s been a learning experience, realizing how much I mentally monitoredCute when Asleepa Gertrude.  Where is she?  Did I leave anything where she can get at it and shouldn’t, is she out of the bedroom before I close the door, did I feed her, does she need fresh water, etc., etc., etc.  It’s a constant ‘Oh, don’t have to think about that, deal with that, worry about that.’  It was different when Simon died, because I had her, so the only thing that changed was that he wasn’t here anymore.  Now, it’s just me left, and everything has changed.  😦

No Question Today

Not been the best day ever.  Been in a lot of pain lately, and sleeping a lot.  Gertrude has not been looking well, and last night she had a sort of mini-seizure.  First time ever.  Took her to the vet, he found a mass in her stomach which was not there last time, and she weighed less than 5 pounds, poor baby.  He recommended, and I agreed, putting her down.  She draped herself over me which she never does while we were waiting, like she just felt so bad she couldn’t fight anymore.  So it is done.  Her treat crumbs are on the floor, a bit of food still in her dish.  I kind of knew, but still wasn’t really expecting it today, so I am kind of numb right now.  With Simon, I knew he had cancer and the time would come, with Gertrude, there was still the hope that it was just an illness that could be cured.  But no.  She was a good cat.  I am going to miss her for a very long time.  I still miss Simon, for that matter, and it’s been years.  Anyway, that’s how it’s been.2017-05-30 19.12.19


5: are you self-conscious of your smile?

Nope.  Well that was easy.

6927531    Not my smile, but it’s a gorgeous one.

I got FIOS yesterday.  Hooray.  So done with Comcast.  It took four hours to install, but about an hour an a half was spent dealing with maintenance trying to get them to come and unlock the cellar door.  I’d been calling all week and they did not return a call til 7:30 yesterday morning.  Need the cellar open by 1pm please.  No prob.  HA!  1 pm, Verizon guy comes, cellar locked.  I must have called maintenance ten times, first just to get them to call me back, then a huge rigamarole about ‘is he coming to open the door or not’, then she gives me the code to the lockbox.  Did not even know there was a lockbox, and why could she just not given it to me in the first place.  You used to go across the street to the locksmith and get a key, but that was too easy, I guess.  So guy goes down stairs, whoa!, there is no lockbox.  More phone calls.  Finally get told you have to go down the OTHER stairs, punch in the code, back up the stairs, down the hall, down the first stairs, and open the door.  Really?  REALLY?  Could you not have given me all this info from the get-go.  The maintenance guy is very nice, but the phone person is an idiot.  Verizon tech was very patient and friendly and nice, so it wasn’t a miserable hassle, just a hassle.  But it’s done now.

DD came down the day before and cleared out a space in the storage closet for him to put the box.  The modem is right outside it, and everything is wireless and so incredibly easy to set up.  It took less than five minutes to set up my FireStick, kindle, and kindle fire.  I remember the Comcast hassles.  I told the tech, I’d better love FIOS after all this time and work you put in.  lolol

Still a lot of pain going on, and some brain-fog, but I am not a complete lump on the couch, so it’s all good.  I just wish I could get some pain meds that worked and did not cause other problems at the same time.  Pain is not fun.


Almost deleted this day before yesterday.  I was quite upset over something, and felt like I’m just talking to the wall and what’s the point of blogging if nobody reads it or comments.  One person comments.  One lovely person in Tasmania.  I’ve been blogging for over ten years, and I have one commentor.  So I must be a crap blogger, to go along with the annoying person I was told I am.  So I was just going to give it all up.  But I am better today, and besides, it’s like keeping a journal, only public.  I suppose I could just make it private, but I need to think about it.  I’ve met (and lost) some nice people over these ten years.  And if I’m an annoying person, I’ll just have to try to do better.

I was thinking about Twitter and Facebook and Tumbler, too.  Why am I even on those. Very little feedback ever.  It’s not depressing, it’s not depressing, it’s not depressing.

Okay, done feeling sorry for myself.  Too much unrelenting pain does a number on you, emotionally as well as physically, so I just need to rally and stop being a whinger.  Done.

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?

Cream, no sugar. I do not like sweet drinks. Used to have a cappuccino maker, but now I just have regular coffee from the French Press. Aren’t these questions exciting?



Actually slept, and slept well last night.  Did NOT want to get up, but fill-in homemaker this morning, so had to.  Feeling a bit better than I have been, too.  Less pain.  Sleep really is crucial when you have fibromyalgia.  Getting good sleep is hard though.  I’m getting some valerian root to make a tincture that is supposed to help, and help with pain, too.  It uses vodka, so that may be the key ingredient.  LOL  I’m at the ‘yes, I will try any crack remedy that comes down the pike’ phase.  Nothing any doctor has ever prescribed has helped, except Prednisone, which isn’t supposed to work for fibro as far as I know.  And I have to get off it, anyway.

Much nicer day than yesterday.  Yellow air alert, not as hot, not as humid.  Just have the windows open and the fan blowing on me.This would have been great for yesterday’s post, but it’s never too late, right?  Fans are like little miracle-workers.  I have one that blows hot air so when it’s cold, I can just warm me, and not the entire room.

Little update.  It just occurred to me that I took two ibuprofen before bed last night.  That’s why I slept and slept better.  I have just been taking generic tylenol, and tylenol is not for fibro, but it’s all I’m supposed to take.  HA!  Ibuprofen works.  I just have to be cautious and make sure I’ve eaten before taking it, because stomach issues otherwise.  Exciting questions, exciting update.  It’s all good.  LOL

This would have great for yesterday’s post, but I just saw it today.  🙂


what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?

I have bookmarks, but once in a while I’ll just use a small piece of paper.

2017-06-12 13.55.31-2

I know, the J is backwards.

I am so over pain, stiffness, and not sleeping.  I was up all night, almost fell asleep at 8, 8:30 and finally did around 9am.

Not having the best day ever, but my friend Tess came over to take my paperwork to Housing, since I am not at all capable of walking half a block.  We sat and chatted for a good while, in the damp heat.  I hauled out the dehumidifier, and it helps, but that and the fan do not actually cool anything down.  They have not changed the central air/heat filter in about three years, and my electric bill was very high this winter, I think because it was over-working, and the ac will just be as bad.  Besides, the units on the roof are really old and mine breaks down at least once a year, and I am worried it will catch on fire or something.  Maybe that’s what they’re hoping for.  I’m sure they have insurance for the building, but there is no insurance for me.

Anyway, Tess and I talked about Housing, and the political situation in this country.  She doesn’t usually like to talk about it, since her hubbies watches Fox News and gets upset about things all the time.  She hopes he’s not ‘one of them’ but he never really says, so she isn’t sure.  I’d hate it if one of my family was a Trump supporter, or even sort of agreed with the Republican agenda.  Not knowing may be best.  🙂  He’s a nice guy, whenever I see him anyway.

Was an orange air alert day today, but better tomorrow.  Will start cooling down, too.  Cannot wait.

Torchwood, before they ruined it by bringing in Gwen.


Not a lot else to say.  I am in a lot of pain and just need to lie down and read some Torchwood fan fiction.  Or even a book.  I have loads of books that I am gradually plowing through.  Trying to reach my ’50 books this year’ Goodreads goal.  I used to read a lot more, then I found fan fiction and my Kindle, and so books kind of got the short end of the stick.  But I am a fast reader, with a wide-ranging taste in literature, so there’s always something I cannot put down til the last page.  Reading is my greatest joy in life, I think.  I remember wanting to read so very badly when I was really young.  I would pretend to read the paper, and agonized over not knowing how to actually read it.  My grandmother would read bits to me sometimes, and I think that helped with the figuring it out.  Once I did figure it out,  and ever since, I have read everything I could get my hands on.  Everything.  I can’t imagine not having something to read.

So off to the couch and my Kindle.  Have a good day, wherever you may be.



2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintry day?


Yes.  I’d rather be cold than too warm.  Maybe not THIS cold, but still.  Picture is from buzzfeed.com.

Not really happy to say that I keep getting worse.  Woke up in a LOT of pain today.  Been sitting in the rocker with the laptop on my little white table.  All my joints are very stiff, making moving difficult and painful.  My shoulders…I can barely move my arms and it really hurts.  Not moving really hurts.  No clue what is going on.  This is different than the usual fibro woes.

I am rocking, Gertrude is vegging on the couch.  She is now eating the fancy-schmantzy cat food that she would not touch before, and I think it’s been a couple of days since I crammed a pill down her throat, and she has not been sick at all.  Hmmm.  She comes to tell me when she wants more food.  This is new, too.  She has decided she likes Marie, my homemaker, and actually comes out while she is here.  Does not do that for anyone else.  Not Tess, who’s been coming here since 2004, or my Traci, who came twice a week for eight years.  She is like a different cat since she got sick, but in a good way.  Weird.2017-06-11 12.56.09

Binge watching Inspector Lewis on Prime.  Did I say that before.? I love that show, and Endeavour, and Midsommer Murders, New Tricks.  Character-driven shows that are interesting and have some funny in them as well.  So much dreck out there.  I am going to be upset for awhile abut Sense8, too.  Stupid Netflix.

Switching to FIOS internet.  Much cheaper than I am paying Comcast, and will still be cheaper after the first-year rise.  They are coming on Thursday to install.  Building is FIOS-ready, so it shouldn’t be too involved, I hope.  I know they have to install a big box in the closet.

Typing hurts. so that’s it for today’s exciting update.  🙂

100 Questions Meme

importD3Found this here: kazzy-cee’s journal, from a post here: The Friday Five.

I’ve not been too enthused about blogging lately, since I get virtually no feedback, and I’ve been feeling quite abandoned in my real life as well.  Having a chronic illness does not make for a lot of friends.  The ones I had just seemed to fall by the wayside.  I still have one faithful friend, for whom I am truly grateful, but it is discouraging to just be alone almost all the time.  No emails, no calls, no visits, except for that one friend.  No one to say, ‘Hi, I was just thinking about you and wanted to check in.’ or whatever.  Such is life.

Anyway, now that I am done with the self-pity portion of today’s post, I thought I would try this 100 questions thing as an incentive to say something, even if I’m only talking to myself, which I do all the time anyway.  🙂

So first question:  1. When you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?  

Not the most exciting topic ever, but what the hey.  I don’t eat cereal a lot, but when I do, I slice a banana into the bowl, top up with however much cereal I want, then pour in whole milk (I do NOT do skim, low-fat, sugar-free, etc.  anything.  If I’m going to eat, I want real food.) till I can see it and the cereal has not quite started to spill over the bowl edges.  How exciting is that?

I have been struggling.  Since I went from seven to six mg Prednisone, I have been in a lot of pain, sleeping a lot, then can’t sleep, and very, very tired.  I then went down to 5 mg because I was already miserable, so might as well.  Going to stay on five as long as I can until my body decides to start making cortisol on it’s own, if it ever does.  My doctor’s PA prescribed Celebrex, after much resistance on my part.  The side effects are not good, and she gave me the highest dose, which is not recommended for someone my age.  Anyway, it eased the pain a bit for about four hours, then nothing.  It’s a 24 hour pill, and you cannot take anything else while taking it.  Took it two days in a row, same result.  Asked pharmacist if it is cumulative, as in the longer you take it, the better it works.  No.  It should just work right off.  So waited a few days, took it again, still no relief.  So done with that.  Right now I am just taking generic tylenol when I really can’t cope.  Cannot take too many ibuprofens or Aleve, because since they had me take the pill to keep it from bothering my stomach, which it wasn’t, it now bothers my stomach.  I have decided to not take any more new meds.  Period.  This is ridiculous.  Everything they give me makes me worse in different ways, not better.  The meloxicam caused severe lower back pain, the omeprazole killed my stomach, even though it’s the one that’s supposed to prevent that.  The celebrex didn’t work and has really bad side effects that can just happen without warning.  Not worth the risk for minimal pain relief.  They are just so insistent, and I am worn down from pain and fatigue and my resistance ability is not as strong as it once was.

Meanwhile, I am missing the summer, being pretty much house-bound again.  I think I would have been better off if they had not put me on Prednisone in the first place.  It’s been five years of hell.  Five years.  Over and above whatever the fibromyalgia is causing.

On the bright side, if I can think of a bright side today, I am trying a new version of Peet’s coffee which I am loving.  I usually drink Major Dickerson’s Blend, and I am trying Big Bang, which is quite nice.  Using my french-press, although some days I make a pot on the stove, and some days I use a filter over a cup.  Depends on my energy level and how desperate I am for COFFEE NOW!!!!  A couple of times, my new homemaker has made it for me, on the days she comes at 10am.   I am not awake at ten am, although my body makes an attempt at pretending I am.  Anyway, I told her exactly how to make it.  She followed my directions exactly both times, and both times her coffee was better than mine.  What?  LOL  She even boiled some eggs for me one day.  She is a real keeper, so I’m hoping she stays.  They do seem to come and go.  Being a homemaker is a shit job with low pay, no benefits, and they don’t get paid mileage between one client and another, which makes the actual pay even less.  I am as nice and grateful as I can be to them, because I would be living in a dump without them.  Some people treat them like servants, or slaves.  I’ve heard stories.  People can be real shits, you know, and why is it the people who do the actual work that get paid the least, and those who sit in the office doing very little get the big bucks?  It seems so unfair.

Anyway, I keep the coffee in the freezer, and just fill a small container to sit out and use everyday.  Stays nicely fresh a lot longer that way.

Started out a nice day, but is clouding up.  Up until maybe three days ago, it was nothing but gray for days on end, and as cold as October.  I had the fireplace on maybe three days ago.  It is June, Mother Nature.  But it’s not hot and sticky, so I will not complain.  I would rather be cold and have warm clothes and blankets and hot drinks and a fireplace, than be hot and sticky, because there is not a lot to be done for that.  Even air-conditioning does not really make it that much better.  It rained a lot, too.  We haven’t been having a lot of rain or snow the past few years.  It used to rain or snow for days at a time, but no more.  Until this month.  So yay.  You cannot convince me that the climate is not changing.  This year we had the warmest February, and the coldest May and now June, that I ever remember in all the years I’ve lived in New England.

Wow, once you get me started, I just seem to have a lot to say.  Okay.  So that’s the first question, and I will try to do this everyday, but some days I don’t even turn on the laptop, so am not promising anything.  🙂

Avoiding Everything