Went to Westport with Tess. Lovely day, lovely ocean, had lunch at a little place she found on line. Lobster rolls. New England cut hot dog buns, tiny bit of lettuce, topped with lobster, lobster, lobster. Drawn butter (ghee) on the side, and the best french fries ever. These were cut and cooked on site, none of that frozen, pre-done crap. Really tasted like fries my dad used to make. He made his own waffle-fry cutter once, too. My dad could cook. Seriously.

We used to spend a lot of time near the ocean when I was married. Plymouth or Newport (Second Beach, anyone) while we lived in Mass, then all up and down the NH/Maine coast when we lived in NH. I miss those days sometimes. There is nothing like the ocean. Nothing.

So today is recovery day. I always forget to figure in recovery day, but it always happens anyway. Never plan activities two days in a row when you have fibro. Trust me on this.

Today is another beautiful, gorgeous, sunny with blue skies and white fluffy clouds kind of day. This is a really good summer so far. Somes years I’ve had the a/c on almost every day starting in May. So far only one day this year, and that was for my homemaker. Cleaning when it’s hot and sticky is not fun, and worse when you’re on the low end of the pay scale. Why is it the people who do the actual work are the ones who get shafted in the pay department? Hardly seems fair.

Going to lie down and read now. Every part of my poor ole bod hurts. But it’s a beautiful day, which makes up for a lot. 😄

Oh, got a little bit of sunburn, too. I am definitely white Anglo-Saxon, and the sun is not my skin’s friend. Most of my ancestors are from the British Isles. Rain, rain, rain. After that, more rain. 🙂

Been silent again for a bit. Been struggling. Feeling depressed. I’ve now read that melatonin can cause depression, so am mostly avoiding it, and the sleeping thing is not going well. Not sure what to do about that. Feel like I am dying of loneliness. Missing my garden, wishing I had an outside so I could go sit in it. Looked up available apts in my area, and OMG are they all out of my price range, or what? Rents are ridiculous, and I am very lucky to be where I am. Even though it doesn’t have an outside. Stuck. No options. I’m sure there are a lot of people like that, and in much worse circumstances. This is not a bad place to live at all. I just really miss having access to outdoors that does not mean a main street in the middle of downtown. Anyway, aside from all that, am not doing too badly. Reading a lot, watching shows on Netflix, etc. The Sense8 movie was the best wrap-up ever. So glad I got to see it. I almost didn’t watch this show from the get go, but gave it a second chance, and never regretted it for a second. Really good show. All the really good shows get cancelled, in favor of the lowest common denominator drek, but you get to enjoy it while it lasts. LOST OMG was LOST ever a good show, up to a point. Then it just got stupid. Same with Battlestar Galactica, the new one. Edge of seat stuff, then not. Could have skipped the entire last season and not missed anything worth watching. Wish I had, actually. Am doing NCIS, and will until they bring on the blond. She just ruined it for me. Not because she’s blond, people. Am rewatching some favs, Midsommer Murders, cause it’s beautiful, Lewis because I love Lewis, and laurence fox, OMG. New Tricks, just because. And I love their version of “It’s all right”, sung by Dennis Waterman. I watched all of Keeping Faith with Eve Myles. I don’t like Eve Myles, because Gwen, but it was pretty good anyway. I was giving her a chance. There’s a series of movies ‘The Suspicions of Mr Whicher, which are pretty good, too. The best thing about all of this is no commercials. I love no commercials. It’s my favorite thing. So that’s the update. Yay.

I’m so thrilled with not being overwhelmed in the kitchen anymore, I rearranged my spice rack and am making pizza and chocolate bread. Store bought dough, but hey, you can’t have everything. I’m making pizza with olive oil, garlic, onions, mozzarella, and some Italian seasonings. No tomato. The chocolate bread is you enfold some Hershey bar or whatever chocolate you like in bread dough, sealing edges. Let it rise, bake and yummy yum yum. You can just stuff chocolate in hot fresh bread, but I like it this way.

So achy and painful today, but not as exhausted as yesterday. The thing with fibro is sometimes the pain doesn’t start til two or three days later, and sometimes then lasts for day after day after day. But it was so worth it.

Pizza. I only used half a package of dough so I had the rest for the chocolate bread, it’s in m iron skillet and it’s not been baked yet. Smells really good, though.

And done:

Came Sunday. I am amazed. In three hours, she completely redid my kitchen. Helped me decide what to keep and what to donate, made things easily accessible for me, took away discards and donations. Really impressed. She is very nice and fun and friendly, and so worth the money. Planning to have her back to do another room next month.
Yesterday I was exhausted, because you kind of have to take an active part in the organizing, and today the pain has hit in full force. But it was so worth it. Happy camper is me. 🙂

My friend Tess came over and rescued me from stir-craziness. We discussed kitchen organizing, she tried to teach me to knit (Ha Ha Ha), and we played Big Kahuna, our favorite game from Big Fish Games. Knitting and I are not compatible. Tess can’t crochet and I can, so we can trade off made items. 🙂 Didn’t get anything spiffed in kitchen, but am going to load the dishwasher in a bit, and maybe run it even though it won’t be full, just so all the dishes will be in place before the great reorganization happens. So not a bad day, overall. Yay.

is coming tomorrow.  She has another job and tomorrow is the only day she has free.  Other job is pretty much the same, but for a company, not herself.  I am  hoping to spiff up the kitchen a bit today.  Took three ibuprofen a few minutes ago, so hopefully I will be in some sort of working order later on.

After some icky humid days, it is going to dry out this afternoon.  Turned on the a/c yesterday for the first time this year, mainly for the homemaker, who then spent the entire two hours at the grocery store.  But the a/c is still on.  🙂

Been thinking a lot about this being alone thing.  Friends move on.  I get that.  They don’t need you anymore because they have other things in their lives, not having a car, so can’t go to them instead of them coming to you, that makes a difference, too.  So what do hermits do?  How do they survive without much human contact?  I’m actually pretty good on my own, it’s just sometimes it feels like I am dying of loneliness.  Just sometimes, though.  I need to think on this.  What to do, what to do?  🙂