Am I. Finally. Eye stopped hurting and cleared up. No more blood. Sinuses still need work, however.

It is a beautiful day. Not too humid, not too warm. Summer should always be like this.

Today, what’s left of it, I’m wanting to do a bit of cooking. Yesterday I had hot dogs and later made caprese salad with mango. Very nice. I found a recipe using bing cherries that I want to try, and mango lassi, which is mango with yogurt and ice blended to a drink. Always wanted to try that, usually wind up just eating the mango. I love mangoes. Mangoes, avocado, bananas, watermelon. It’s all good. Off to make coffee.

The sinus infection seems to have made a return. The headache just never ends. Got an appointment for August 5th. A week? It’s thirty-three dollars round trip via taxi to my doctor’s so at least I have a week to make other arrangements. Like a closer doctor. Or Dial-A-Ride. I’ve had some really awful experiences with Dial-A-Ride, though, so haven’t used it in years. I cannot keep depending on a friend for everything though. I have to work at regaining my mobility and independence. Yes! YES I DO! Sheesh. Also, my eye is swollen and bloody and painful and has been since Tuesday. I am just a walking disaster area, it seems. Never a dull moment.

On the plus side, I haven’t been able to watch The Glades on AETV for whatever reason they are hating on me for, and Hulu only carries clips, so I bought the season pass on Amazon. This is great. Never done this before, but I can buy what I want cheap and I hate Comcast, so it’s win/win all around for me. I like The Glades. What can I say? LOL It’s all good.

I am in one. Pain is back, with a matching headache, just to make it fun. On the bright side, I opened the windows night before last…finally. It is humid today, but not too hot, so bearable with a fan on.

I am hoping to get some cooking done in the next week. Saw a recipe for caprese salad with beets. I like beets. I’ve made the salad with mango instead of tomato, but never with beets. The beets are already cooked, too. Did that the other day. In case you don’t know, caprese salad is sliced fresh mozzarella, sliced tomato, basil, olive oil, salt and pepper. Lovely.

I want to make banana pudding. Haven’t had that in years and it’s good weather for it. I like to be seasonal in my cooking and eating. Things are better when they’re in season, and special if you don’t have them any old time. Autumn has always been stuffed cabbage and apple pie time. Looking forward to that. This hasn’t been the best summer ever, with the awful heat and humidity we’ve had. I had the a/c on for seven days. The longest sequential use ever here. Not looking forward to the electric bill, that’s for sure.

I’ve lost my friend in Finland again. He deleted his lovely blog and I haven’t heard from him since. I’m really hoping he is okay, but I may never know. It makes me sad, but nothing I can do about it. Oh, well.

It’s still hot. Not AS hot, but hot and humid nevertheless. The dewpoint went into the 80’s a couple of days ago. Srsly???? So I have been shut in my little prison box for a good week, with no fresh air, cause there hasn’t been any. It’s getting me down, I admit it. Life is feeling rather blah at the moment, and is it fall yet? No?

I actually do really well on my own most of the time, but motivation to actually do anything just seems to fade away over time. The more alone I am, the more I withdraw and just quit caring about anything at all. I haven’t even worn anything but pajamas (tee shirt and cotton trousers) for a week. Why get dressed? No one is coming to visit and I am certainly not going anywhere. Man, sometimes I just wish I was one of those go-getter always doing something types, instead of the slug on the couch with the laptop version that I am. But, it is what it is, and I am what I am. Thank you Popeye.

It’s 96.7 degrees Fahrenheit, dew point 80, with a ‘feels like’ of 116. 116. I am not able to wrap my head around this. This is so far beyond normal it truly is scary. This is Massachusetts, people, not Arizona or Death Valley. In the southwest, the humidity is low, but here…humidity makes breathing hard, among other things. My friend Tess says it’s like breathing through a wet sponge. I have my central air set on 75, and it is quite comfy in here, but I am among the fortunate ones. Not every one has a/c. I can’t imagine living in this heat without it. I have a very small apartment, too, so not that hard to keep cool. In the most feeble effort ever, I have everything possible unplugged in hopes that the power grid doesn’t go down. I like to do my part, even if it’s only in my imagination. It looks beautiful outside. A strong breeze is blowing, the air does not look yukky, and yet, if I were to go outside…I’m sure I’d wish I hadn’t. There’s not even much traffic, which tells me most other people are not going outside, either. I cannot imagine having to work outside in this. Okay. End of ‘OMG, the weather has gone insane’ rant.

<—Definitely NOT me.

Last night, I steamed some broccoli and made broccoli salad. Yes, this counts as cooking for me. But I was pleased. I also cleaned out the frig and organized it's contents. Next is the freezer.

After a relatively pain-free (relative being the key word here) day yesterday, today it's all back again. Still, though, I am hoping to get something accomplished besides sitting on the couch playing on the laptop. I am up to level 19 on Bejewelled Twist, and I have read and read and read more fan fiction than you can possibly imagine, but the real world needs some attention. I'm hoping to be able to provide that, but we'll see how it goes.

The weather alert says high heat and humidity are moving in this afternoon. What have we been having for the past several days, then? Cause it's been pretty hot and soupy out there. Earlier today, the dewpoint was 79. Has to be a record. Just checked…right now it's 88 degrees fahrenheit with a dewpoint of 80. Humidity is 77 percent. Also, it's a bad air day. We have moved from soup to cream soup??? Ewww, that's an analogy I could have skipped over. If you're wondering about the dewpoint:
Dewpoint Explanation

Just read where a Democratic senator said the Republicans had morphed into a ‘cult’ that only had one agenda, keeping tax cuts for themselves and their cronies. I paraphrased that a bit, but I do so think he’s right on this. My gods, this country has lost it’s collective mind.

Yesterday, my homemaker told me that she and her husband had stopped to help a man having a seizure. The man said he cannot afford his seizure medication. This is America. No, wait. This used to be America. The true measure of a society is how it cares for the least fortunate in it. Our society says, “I’ve got mine, so screw you. Oh, and if there is any of yours left, give it to me NOW!” I would emigrate, but how would I decide where to go that isn’t just as bad, and who would take me in, anyway? It’s not looking good, folks. Not even a little bit. Does anyone remember the whole fall of Rome thing? Do you see any similarities? The rich play and the rest of society suffers. That is just not sustainable for any real length of time.

Oh, I am cheery today, people. Also, I am cheery today, people. And it’s still hot and soupy outside, and going to get worse tomorrow.

This is looking good right about now. Yesterday’s temp was nearly 90 with a dewpoint of 73. Seventy-three!!

I’m not loving it. I have had the a/c on more this year than ever before, and it’s not looking good for open windows any time soon. There is an excessive heat watch for tomorrow into Friday, something we have never had before. Is the climate changing? What do you think?

For the second day in a row, I’ve woken up before six am. At least I was asleep before I woke up. LOL Not up all night, I mean. Anyway…yesterday I had to go back to bed around 10, and probably will again today. I only had about three hours sleep last night. My homemaker was back from vacation yesterday, and while I wasn’t sure she was coming over, I turned on the ringer on the bedroom phone, just in case. Good thing, cause I didn’t hear the door so she had tocall me to let her in. Glad she’s back. She’s really nice and fun. Fun is good.

Things I’m hoping to do today: clear out at least a shelf or two in the frig, prep the veg I bought the other day, cook something? Yeah, that’s all going to happen. But still, I’m hoping.

Pretty cool, I think. I’m watching Leverage on Hulu, and they are at a costume party undercover, and Timothy Huttons character went as Ellery Queen, who was played by his father, Jim Hutton. I used to watch that show. Neat.

I am. Much less pain yesterday. Actually went out for coffee and some shopping with my friend Tess, and didn’t completely collapse from pain. Yay, me. I actually bought some lovely fresh veggies. Now I’m hoping for the energy to actually prep and cook them. Tess offered to chop an onion for me, or cut up the broccoli. We became ever so slightly hysterical in Shaw’s, laughing over ‘onion emergency’ and ‘broccoli alert’. We are very entertaining….to ourselves, anyway. We were on the phone the other day and she said her hubbies was standing there circling a finger by his head. You know, crazy. LOL

It’s been gorgeous the past couple of days, but I think the yukkyness is going to ramp up over the weekend. Not looking forward to that. Soupy air is soupy, and unpleasant.

Really, really hoping for energy and motivation enough to get something done today. Fell asleep on the couch sometime last night, I don’t even remember, and woke up at 3:30 am or so, feeling fine. Was up all night AGAIN the night before. I can’t fight the sleep issues anymore, and I hate taking the knock-out pill. It’s bad for my liver, and it doesn’t always work. I already take two other ‘bad for my liver’ meds, one being extra-strength excedrin, the only pain pill that actually works at all, so I’m not going to take something that doesn’t always work, unless I’m desperate to sleep because I have to be up at a certain time for whatever reason. Meanwhile, I’m just going with the flow. Sleep when I’m sleepy, don’t when I’m not. Makes for an interesting schedule, let me tell you. ‘smile’ Poor Gertrude never knows what’s going on, but she at least doesn’t bug me to feed her like Simon used to. He would walk around my head and over my body to wake me up. He’s a lot like Simon’s Cat from the videos. It could be Simon THE Cat, but it’s not. LOL

Simon with flashed-out eyes. I really miss him. Gertrude is a sweetie, but she’s not him. She’s much too polite.

It has cooled down and dried out. Opened the windows yesterday afternoon. Hooray.

Slept til 3 pm yesterday, so up all night again. Still with the pain, but not quite as bad. Did a system image of my pc, which took 9 hours and 11 disks. Holy shimoleon. Never doing that again. Meanwhile, I spent the no-pc time clearing off my desk, sorting papers, going through coupons, filing, all that fun organizing stuff.

I set aside the Torchwood radio plays to listen to somewhere down the line, since I can’t cope with them now. It’s only been two years. I’m sure I’ll be recovering sometime soon. But I will never forgive RTD for being such a despicable human being. So there! If you’re not a Torchwood fan, just ignore this paragraph. LOL

I managed to unload the bottom half of the dishwasher last evening. Just the top half to go. Who would think that would be even considered an achievement? So many things we take for granted when we’re healthy become near insurmountable tasks when we’re not. I’ve lost a lot of mobility, have a fraction of the energy I used to have, and have discarded so many things from my life that I just don’t have enough spoons to deal with anymore. You do know about spoons, don’t you? Have you heard about The Spoon Theory. Google it if you’re interested. It’s for anyone with a chronic, debilitating illness. Fun to say, not to have. Lately I’ve been having fewer and fewer spoons to start out with, so most anything I want/need to do is beyond me. Not looking for sympathy, I’m not comfortable getting sympathy, just stating a fact of my life.

Think I need a nap now. Later, dear readers.

In fact, as my friend Tess says, it’s Supersonic Yukky. Yesterday was just Super Yukky. Yes, we have classes of yukky, people. Today it was around 90 something, and the dewpoint was in the low 70’s Living in soup and breathing through a wet sponge. I love my a/c. Yes. Yes I do. I am ending my second day, going into my third night of pain having a party all over my body. Didn’t sleep the past two nights, had a four hour nap yesterday and that’s it. Feeling fine. Well, except for the pain party.

Tess drove me to Stop and Shop yesterday so I could get some groceries, since my homemaker is on vacation this week, and I didn’t want a replacement. You can get some real doozys, and I’d prefer not to, thank you very much. My god, the price of food is ridiculous, and it’s only going to get worse, I think.

I watched Warehouse 13 and Eureka on Hulu. Finally, something I’m interested in. I’m also watching a 20-part Korean period drama, “The Painter of the Wind’, which is beautiful. Costumes, scenery, very good actors, and English sub titles. Thank goodness.

Nothing exciting happening here. Just getting through the day til the pain party is over and I can actually get around without the constant owing I’m doing now. LOL Oh, I ate two mangoes today. I love mangoes. And avocados. And artichokes. And bananas. Aren’t you glad I shared that?

Yesterday a friend and I were discussing what has happened to this country. Well, actually we started out talking about the root beer float I was planning on having later, got into soda in general, which neither of us drink but rarely, moved on to diet soda and that horrible fake sugar they used to use in it. Cyclamate, I think it was. From there, we moved on to how it might effect the brain and why it was banned, when we had a revelation. We never drank diet soda, either of us, and that’s why we are two of the minority in this country who still have the ability to think.

Not only did those diet soda drinkers not lose weight, because diet soda causes weight gain, especially when you drink it with your mashed potatoes and gravy, but they also incurred enough brain damage to become utter morons. Did you watch the Miss America questions vid, and the math parody vid? Have you ever seen Jay Leno’s man on the street interviews? So here we are. A really neat vid. You have to pay attention to what the guy is saying. Then seriously, read the comments. People can’t discern snark from truth. People can’t discern. People still support the (insert extremely unflattering descriptive word here) Republicans, even though it is clear, and even reported on the actual news, that they are working against the best interests of those very voters/supporters, and are proud of it.

I have lost all hope. Srsly. Here’s the vid.

Seems the magic wine, extra strength excedrin combo really did work. Still better. Two good days in a row where I actually was functional and got things done. Things that involved more than clicking ‘enter’ on the keyboard. Actual, get up off the couch and move stuff.

Course then I couldn’t sleep last night and then slept from 7am to 2pm, and am now up with a headache and a desperate need to turn off the a/c and open the windows, if the temperature wasn’t 92.5 Fahrenheit with a dew point of 62. 60 is the line when it comes to the dew point. Below that is bearable, above that, just a lot of ick. I like summer, really I do. I liked it in Colorado, anyway. But here in New England, with heat AND humidity, not so much. I know I’ve said this before, but it really is the humidity that makes it miserable. Like trying to live in soup. I don’t even like soup all that much.

I’m really happy to be feeling better, I must say. Having a brain that works and a body that won’t cooperate is frustrating. It was easier to cope with the body not working when the brain was in such a fog that it didn’t matter anyway. Now, my brain can think ahead, and plan, and envision. Things I was not able to do for a very long time. So I want the body to be able to carry out all my plans and ideas. It’s a good thing when they both work at the same time. Yes. Yes it is.

Seems that’s all I’ve got now, except I got turkey hot dogs this week. 4.99 for a package of hot dogs. God, I do not read the grocery receipt often enough. It makes it less painful, but on the other hand, I still have 69 cents for hotdogs stuck in my brain. Sticker shock. Yes, it’s been a long time since I was able to do my own shopping people. LOL

Edited, due to my brain being missing.

My visitors came.  My friends Beth and John.  They put together my new flat-pack but real wood dresser, took away the old ponderous one and an extra mattress, then we went out for dinner at a fab, really fab, Mexican restaurant up Route One.  Had several glass of wine, along with my last antibiotic and two extra-strength excedrin (wave goodbye to my liver) and felt fine.  Really.  Tomorrow could be back to exhaustion and pain, but today was a good day.  Had so much fun.  Played the ‘Go The F— To Sleep’ and ‘Chef Tommy’ vids for them.  Hysterical.  John asked me to email them to him so he could show them to someone else.  It was such a fun day. I am happy.

Tim Guinee

“Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting a tomato in a fruit salad.”

Love Tim Guinee.

My visitors are coming today.  Took me an hour to get dressed.  Took last antibiotic today, so am hoping this CFS thing resolves itself into a functional me soon.  Hoping.

Have I mentioned that I’ve been feeling horrible for awhile now?  Maybe I should read my own blog.  Ha!  Anyway, There was a chance I’d be having visitors today, so I thought it would be a good idea to change out of the clothes I’d been wearing around the clock since Tuesday, and actually take a shower.  So I did.  By the time I got out of the shower, I was so exhausted that I felt nauseous.  Had I run a marathon?  No.  I’d taken a shower.  Good thing I don’t get sick very often, if it’s going to exacerbate the CFS and fibro this much.  Also, the visiting thing didn’t happen.  Which is good, because I am virtually immobile at this point.  Oh, well.