Four good days IN A ROW! Got my kitchen drawers organized, made the world’s best pizza, organized my desk, unloaded the dishwasher. I am on a roll. Won’t say I hope it lasts, but I hope it lasts.

DD sent light this am, and I woke up in less pain and feeling better than I have in a long time. DD is a healer. Seriously, I am a skeptic, but it really does seem to help. Here is her site:

As You Wish

We are bracing for Hurricane Irene, which I really don’t think is going to have much effect where I am, but making sure to have water, etc., just in case. Enough meds for a week, also. When we first moved here, way back in the paleolithic era, a hurricane just skirted New England, and I remember the sky went this really eerie greenish color for awhile. Spooky. Never seen anything like it before. We never had a hurricane in Colorado, to my knowledge. Hailstorms, yes, but no hurricanes. 🙂

I hope everyone has taken precautions if they live in a danger zone. Pick up loose items in your yard. Very important. Flying objects can kill people. Be safe, people.

But I am brave, so I will just say it. I am feeling better. This is my THIRD good day in a row. Third! Usually what happens now is I crash and don’t have any more good days for a loooooong time. Just because I opened my big mouth. But hey. Tuesday was homemaker day, then I went out with Tess for some shopping. Much pain after, but I had fun. Yesterday, less pain, felt okay, got things done. Today, even less pain, feeling good, getting things done. Getting things done. Three little words that represent so much. Getting things done in the physical world is major for someone with chronic, debilitating illness. It feels good. It gives me hope. Then, as I said, I usually crash and back to the same old same old. But I enjoy the getting things done phase while it’s here. Yes. Yes I do!

Dear Torchwood: Miracle Day « Letters to Television.

But in the comments is another who says watching is painful, but they’ll keep watching.  Let’s encourage RTD, shall we?

Yes. Yes I am. Somewhat. Actually got things done today. More than one. Yay, me. Stopped the yogurt, and it seems that was killing my stomach, not the meds. Interesting. Cabot Greek Style. I should have stuck with Fage. Costs more, but worth it. It’s very muggy again, but gray and looks like rain. I like rain. Changed the bed, new cover, too. Pretty. It’s not NEW, it’s new to the bed. LOL Okay, better, but still crazy. You lucky readers, you.

I’m just a big ball of whine lately. I hate whine. I can’t sleep again, the antibiotics have caused a big pit of acid in my stomach, my head still feels like it did before I started taking the antibiotic, and no explanatory phone call from my ex-doctor about how they could just abandon me with an infection and no meds. Crap, crap, crap. Also, crap. So skipped the antibiotic last night and stomach is not well, but better today. Got up late after not sleeping much at all, so missed the morning dose as well, but am going to take it late. Any minute now. As soon as I can tear myself away from the computer. I’m a mess, my house (for ‘house’ read ‘teeny tiny apartment’) is a mess, and I not only don’t have enough energy to do anything about it, I barely have enough energy to care. Being sick wears you down, especially when added on to the permanent being sick that is fibro/CFS, which wears you down quite enough on it’s own. So whine, whine, whine. And crap!

I decided to post this before I watched it all, but then came the part that is relevant to my previous post, so two reasons for it being here on my blog.

“The moral test of a society is how that society treats those who are in the dawn of life . . . the children; those who are in the twilight of life . . . the elderly; and those who are in the shadows of life . . . the sick, the needy, and the handicapped.”

—Hubert Humphrey

Our society protects the wealthiest, at the expense of the rest of us. My friend Tess and I frequently puzzle over what has happened to people. The ability to think, reason, understand, seems to have transmogrified into mindless belief of whatever they are told, regardless of science, what their eyes can see in front of them, regardless of proof of the opposite. It is rather frightening, when you think about it. We joke that it is cyclamates. Neither of us ever drank soda that contained cyclamates. Cyclamates were banned as being detrimental to health. We have decided that brain health was the biggest victim, thus we are the only two people left who have critical thinking, reasoning abilities. We blame cyclamates for the state of the country. It’s funny, except that it isn’t. But too much thinking about it is just terrifying. When the citizenry has lost the ability to reason and think for themselves, is there any hope left? I’m afraid not, people. Seriously.

On the illness front, I have had to pass up another weekend with friends due to still having this crappy infection and feeling like…well, not feeling great. I’m not even half way through the antibiotics, though, so there is still hope that I will get better. I will be looking for a new doctor this week, however. You can’t go on vacation and leave me with an infection in my head and no meds and expect to keep me as a patient. No, you really can’t.

On the life in general front, is it autumn yet? I am really not in love with humidity, and this has been a particular humid summer. And hot. And icky. I do try to appreciate each season for what it has to offer, but summer is the hardest one for me to love. I do not like being sticky. I don’t like messy food, either. Except mangoes and watermelon. They can be as messy as they want, cause they are just good. Oh, yeah.

I got them. Giant pills for twice a day for two weeks. Of course, I feel even worse today, which always happens with antibiotics. Worse before better. Oh, well.

To me, anyway. I think I’ve had a low-grade infection for some considerable time.
A while back, I had a brief episode of vertigo. Virus, doctor said.
Then in June, I had a sinus infection. Even my palate (roof of mouth) hurt. Five days of super-anitbiotic. Worked.
Then the sinus problem gradually came back. Off to the doctor on Friday. Prescribed two weeks of antibiotics. Computer slow, but he will get it there. Probably won’t be ready for an hour and a half. Out to dinner with mah friends. Three hours later, go to drugstore, no scrip. They call doctor. Doctor gone on vacation. NO SCRIP! Have to wait til Monday when back-up doctor will be available. Drugstore will call him and hope he can get into my records to find what was prescribed and call it in. Time for a new doctor. Went on vacation and left me with an infection and no meds. Meanwhile, had to cancel weekend with other friends because of having a temperature and feeling lousy from infection, and now feeling even worse today.

At least it’s raining. Rain is always nice, so long as it behaves and doesn’t come down in buckets like it’s done in some parts of the country/world.

Why can’t I win? It all just seems to be conspiring against me. I want my life back, please.

What else is good? Let’s see. Ate some bing cherries yesterday that were out-of-this-world perfect and delicious. Have some left to eat today, too. Have ripe mangoes in frig, always a good thing. Also bacon. I have bacon. Everything goes with bacon, right? I just have to cook some, and voila! Happy mouth. Happy tummy. Bacon!! I only buy it once or twice a year, because I love bacon! And it’s supposedly not that good for you. Ha! Like I care at this point. Since nothing I do makes any difference to how I feel or whether or not I sleep, I’ve even started having coffee whenever I darn well feel like it, instead of only once a day when I get up. And the other day, I ate a protein bar, a small bag of kettle chips, and a carton of maple-walnut ice cream. And nothing ese. If you do all (some?) of the right things (for ‘right’ read ‘things that are supposed to make life better), and they don’t make life better, why bother? That’s my new motto. I don’t give a fuck*, I’m doing what I want when I want, cause nothing works anyway. I like it. 🙂 *Yes, my children, yomama swears. A lot, actually. Get over it. LOLOL

I hope all those who voted these people into office are enjoying themselves about now. I know I’m not. ALL of my income comes from Social Security. I have nothing else, and nothing to fall back on. Thank you, Republicans. Click the link to see what I’m on about.

Social Security and ‘our’ government

Am I. Finally. Eye stopped hurting and cleared up. No more blood. Sinuses still need work, however.

It is a beautiful day. Not too humid, not too warm. Summer should always be like this.

Today, what’s left of it, I’m wanting to do a bit of cooking. Yesterday I had hot dogs and later made caprese salad with mango. Very nice. I found a recipe using bing cherries that I want to try, and mango lassi, which is mango with yogurt and ice blended to a drink. Always wanted to try that, usually wind up just eating the mango. I love mangoes. Mangoes, avocado, bananas, watermelon. It’s all good. Off to make coffee.

The sinus infection seems to have made a return. The headache just never ends. Got an appointment for August 5th. A week? It’s thirty-three dollars round trip via taxi to my doctor’s so at least I have a week to make other arrangements. Like a closer doctor. Or Dial-A-Ride. I’ve had some really awful experiences with Dial-A-Ride, though, so haven’t used it in years. I cannot keep depending on a friend for everything though. I have to work at regaining my mobility and independence. Yes! YES I DO! Sheesh. Also, my eye is swollen and bloody and painful and has been since Tuesday. I am just a walking disaster area, it seems. Never a dull moment.

On the plus side, I haven’t been able to watch The Glades on AETV for whatever reason they are hating on me for, and Hulu only carries clips, so I bought the season pass on Amazon. This is great. Never done this before, but I can buy what I want cheap and I hate Comcast, so it’s win/win all around for me. I like The Glades. What can I say? LOL It’s all good.

I am in one. Pain is back, with a matching headache, just to make it fun. On the bright side, I opened the windows night before last…finally. It is humid today, but not too hot, so bearable with a fan on.

I am hoping to get some cooking done in the next week. Saw a recipe for caprese salad with beets. I like beets. I’ve made the salad with mango instead of tomato, but never with beets. The beets are already cooked, too. Did that the other day. In case you don’t know, caprese salad is sliced fresh mozzarella, sliced tomato, basil, olive oil, salt and pepper. Lovely.

I want to make banana pudding. Haven’t had that in years and it’s good weather for it. I like to be seasonal in my cooking and eating. Things are better when they’re in season, and special if you don’t have them any old time. Autumn has always been stuffed cabbage and apple pie time. Looking forward to that. This hasn’t been the best summer ever, with the awful heat and humidity we’ve had. I had the a/c on for seven days. The longest sequential use ever here. Not looking forward to the electric bill, that’s for sure.

I’ve lost my friend in Finland again. He deleted his lovely blog and I haven’t heard from him since. I’m really hoping he is okay, but I may never know. It makes me sad, but nothing I can do about it. Oh, well.

It’s still hot. Not AS hot, but hot and humid nevertheless. The dewpoint went into the 80’s a couple of days ago. Srsly???? So I have been shut in my little prison box for a good week, with no fresh air, cause there hasn’t been any. It’s getting me down, I admit it. Life is feeling rather blah at the moment, and is it fall yet? No?

I actually do really well on my own most of the time, but motivation to actually do anything just seems to fade away over time. The more alone I am, the more I withdraw and just quit caring about anything at all. I haven’t even worn anything but pajamas (tee shirt and cotton trousers) for a week. Why get dressed? No one is coming to visit and I am certainly not going anywhere. Man, sometimes I just wish I was one of those go-getter always doing something types, instead of the slug on the couch with the laptop version that I am. But, it is what it is, and I am what I am. Thank you Popeye.

It’s 96.7 degrees Fahrenheit, dew point 80, with a ‘feels like’ of 116. 116. I am not able to wrap my head around this. This is so far beyond normal it truly is scary. This is Massachusetts, people, not Arizona or Death Valley. In the southwest, the humidity is low, but here…humidity makes breathing hard, among other things. My friend Tess says it’s like breathing through a wet sponge. I have my central air set on 75, and it is quite comfy in here, but I am among the fortunate ones. Not every one has a/c. I can’t imagine living in this heat without it. I have a very small apartment, too, so not that hard to keep cool. In the most feeble effort ever, I have everything possible unplugged in hopes that the power grid doesn’t go down. I like to do my part, even if it’s only in my imagination. It looks beautiful outside. A strong breeze is blowing, the air does not look yukky, and yet, if I were to go outside…I’m sure I’d wish I hadn’t. There’s not even much traffic, which tells me most other people are not going outside, either. I cannot imagine having to work outside in this. Okay. End of ‘OMG, the weather has gone insane’ rant.

<—Definitely NOT me.

Last night, I steamed some broccoli and made broccoli salad. Yes, this counts as cooking for me. But I was pleased. I also cleaned out the frig and organized it's contents. Next is the freezer.

After a relatively pain-free (relative being the key word here) day yesterday, today it's all back again. Still, though, I am hoping to get something accomplished besides sitting on the couch playing on the laptop. I am up to level 19 on Bejewelled Twist, and I have read and read and read more fan fiction than you can possibly imagine, but the real world needs some attention. I'm hoping to be able to provide that, but we'll see how it goes.

The weather alert says high heat and humidity are moving in this afternoon. What have we been having for the past several days, then? Cause it's been pretty hot and soupy out there. Earlier today, the dewpoint was 79. Has to be a record. Just checked…right now it's 88 degrees fahrenheit with a dewpoint of 80. Humidity is 77 percent. Also, it's a bad air day. We have moved from soup to cream soup??? Ewww, that's an analogy I could have skipped over. If you're wondering about the dewpoint:
Dewpoint Explanation

Just read where a Democratic senator said the Republicans had morphed into a ‘cult’ that only had one agenda, keeping tax cuts for themselves and their cronies. I paraphrased that a bit, but I do so think he’s right on this. My gods, this country has lost it’s collective mind.

Yesterday, my homemaker told me that she and her husband had stopped to help a man having a seizure. The man said he cannot afford his seizure medication. This is America. No, wait. This used to be America. The true measure of a society is how it cares for the least fortunate in it. Our society says, “I’ve got mine, so screw you. Oh, and if there is any of yours left, give it to me NOW!” I would emigrate, but how would I decide where to go that isn’t just as bad, and who would take me in, anyway? It’s not looking good, folks. Not even a little bit. Does anyone remember the whole fall of Rome thing? Do you see any similarities? The rich play and the rest of society suffers. That is just not sustainable for any real length of time.

Oh, I am cheery today, people. Also, I am cheery today, people. And it’s still hot and soupy outside, and going to get worse tomorrow.

This is looking good right about now. Yesterday’s temp was nearly 90 with a dewpoint of 73. Seventy-three!!

I’m not loving it. I have had the a/c on more this year than ever before, and it’s not looking good for open windows any time soon. There is an excessive heat watch for tomorrow into Friday, something we have never had before. Is the climate changing? What do you think?

For the second day in a row, I’ve woken up before six am. At least I was asleep before I woke up. LOL Not up all night, I mean. Anyway…yesterday I had to go back to bed around 10, and probably will again today. I only had about three hours sleep last night. My homemaker was back from vacation yesterday, and while I wasn’t sure she was coming over, I turned on the ringer on the bedroom phone, just in case. Good thing, cause I didn’t hear the door so she had tocall me to let her in. Glad she’s back. She’s really nice and fun. Fun is good.

Things I’m hoping to do today: clear out at least a shelf or two in the frig, prep the veg I bought the other day, cook something? Yeah, that’s all going to happen. But still, I’m hoping.

Pretty cool, I think. I’m watching Leverage on Hulu, and they are at a costume party undercover, and Timothy Huttons character went as Ellery Queen, who was played by his father, Jim Hutton. I used to watch that show. Neat.

I am. Much less pain yesterday. Actually went out for coffee and some shopping with my friend Tess, and didn’t completely collapse from pain. Yay, me. I actually bought some lovely fresh veggies. Now I’m hoping for the energy to actually prep and cook them. Tess offered to chop an onion for me, or cut up the broccoli. We became ever so slightly hysterical in Shaw’s, laughing over ‘onion emergency’ and ‘broccoli alert’. We are very entertaining….to ourselves, anyway. We were on the phone the other day and she said her hubbies was standing there circling a finger by his head. You know, crazy. LOL

It’s been gorgeous the past couple of days, but I think the yukkyness is going to ramp up over the weekend. Not looking forward to that. Soupy air is soupy, and unpleasant.

Really, really hoping for energy and motivation enough to get something done today. Fell asleep on the couch sometime last night, I don’t even remember, and woke up at 3:30 am or so, feeling fine. Was up all night AGAIN the night before. I can’t fight the sleep issues anymore, and I hate taking the knock-out pill. It’s bad for my liver, and it doesn’t always work. I already take two other ‘bad for my liver’ meds, one being extra-strength excedrin, the only pain pill that actually works at all, so I’m not going to take something that doesn’t always work, unless I’m desperate to sleep because I have to be up at a certain time for whatever reason. Meanwhile, I’m just going with the flow. Sleep when I’m sleepy, don’t when I’m not. Makes for an interesting schedule, let me tell you. ‘smile’ Poor Gertrude never knows what’s going on, but she at least doesn’t bug me to feed her like Simon used to. He would walk around my head and over my body to wake me up. He’s a lot like Simon’s Cat from the videos. It could be Simon THE Cat, but it’s not. LOL

Simon with flashed-out eyes. I really miss him. Gertrude is a sweetie, but she’s not him. She’s much too polite.