Thank goodness.  Not quite doing the happy dance, but not this close to the black hole, either.  Homemaker showed, place looks much better with vacuuming and all.  I also did a few things.  Used the hand vac to clean behind the left-hand fireplace bookshelf and moved everything back after I had to replace the old and overheating power strip.  Sewed a bit more on my bathrobe.  One whole side to go.  And now I am cooking.  Chicken sausages, onions, fresh sage leaves and apple cider, and baking a sweet and a white potato in the toaster oven.  So real food tonight.  The white potato I will save to scoop out, add an egg to the cavity, and bake it all, scooped stuff too, til egg is to my liking.  This is a really easy and tasty meal.  S and P, a dab of butter, and eat. The sweet potato (I love sweet potatoes, grew up eating them baked, dabbed with butter when done oh yum) I will have along side the sausages.  There will be leftovers, too.

So knowing I will be seeing another human makes a big difference to my mood. and it’s very gray off and on and looks like rain and I love rain, and I feel like I’ve accomplished things, and seen a human and had a conversation, and I really, really need someone to push me to get dressed and go out and interact.  I always manage to talk myself out of it.

I sometimes think that if I didn’t live alone, and had someone to encourage me and give me a little nudge here and there, and even to walk with me, I would do much better.  I am good at taking care of people, but I am really hopeless at taking care of me.  I did really well when the PT guy was coming several times a week, but on my own, I just can’t seem to work up the motivation to overcome the social anxiety and get out there by myself.  Oh, well.  If, if, if.  I choose not to live my life with if, what if, if only, why me.  It is what it is, and it’s up to me to do what needs doing, and if I can’t motivate myself, well it’s my loss.

Anyway, better, better, better.  It’s a good thing.

I had the fireplace on a couple of days ago, and now I am melting from the hot and stickies.  Climate change.  It’s a real thing.  No pictures today.  I am jumping up, tending my dinner, and too lazy to do a picture search.  Sorry about that.

BTW, big thank you shoutout to the one person who comments on here.  Cannot tell you how much I appreciate that.  Just knowing that my posts are not just floating away on thin air is very gratifying.  So thank you, and you know who you are, Miss Tasmania.  🙂

Another BTW. Dinner turned out spectacular.  Brown 1 lb fully-cooked chicken sausages, set aside, cook chopped onions til tender and transparent, return sausage, add 5-6 fresh sage leaves, 3 cups cider.  Remove sausages and keep warm after ten minutes or so, cook rest down til syrupy.  Oh, yum.