Creepy Happenings Are Creepy

all-my-reality-checks-have-bounced (1)So I have been having issues with all of my Amazon products lately. My old keyboard Reader kept freezing up and/or rebooting and the reboot freezing up and sometimes a whole day would go by before it would get itself together. Then the replacement keyboard Reader started doing the same thing, only more so. Sometimes the Fire, wouldn’t. It would start, but only load a blank page, there is never a carousel anymore, which I don’t mind at all, and if I go to the apps tab, it will be empty, or a few will load, etc. etc. etc. So the reboot part was getting worse and worse, and now the Fire won’t connect to the internet AT ALL. (My Nexus 7 works perfectly every time, people. Really, it does.) I was talking to DD today, and telling her all this really fascinating info about my electronic life. Get off the phone. Reading a webpage on my desktop. Desktop reboots. All by its lonesome. I’m sorry. Is there some weird alien energy thing going on here? Have I been magnetized? Do I need to be degaussed? This is just creepy and wrong, people.

Actually, I have a friend who was struck by lightning several years ago, and nothing works right when she is here (she hasn’t been here when any of this was happening). I sometimes tell her she needs to be degaussed. She doesn’t believe me, though.

And another thing. I was so looking forward to the Blue Apron food delivery thing. Of course, Fedex left it in the outer lobby without even buzzing me (Did I mention this already? Has my brain completely forgotten how to work, even after two cups of coffee?), but it’s here, and it looks fantastic, and it turns out I really, really don’t want to cook. At all. Ever. Anything. Oh, crap. Seemed like a good idea at the time. They put in little paper bags rolled up with a label, i.e. ‘Salmon Knick Knacks’. What on earth is a salmon knick knack. It’s the seasonings and really small stuff, stupid. That is so cute. LOL Without having cooked any of the food yet, I will say that if you like to cook, and don’t mind paying for the convenience of no waste and everything measured out and step-by-step directions, I would definitely recommend Blue Apron. Now if someone would just come and do the actual cooking part, my life would be complete.

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