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A few trees are beginning to turn, the weather has gotten much nicer….cooler and less humid. I am feeling much better, too. Every day without sugar-free ice cream has me feeling better than the day before. Very interesting. The picture is the John Greenleaf Whittier house near Haverhill, MASS. It’s by J. Woodhull Adams. I’ve been by the actual house hundreds of times, since it wasn’t that far from where I lived in New Hampshire. It really does look just like that. The main road goes up on the near side of the house, and there is a smaller road that goes by the front.

I just found out I lost another homemaker, due to agency not providing her enough hours. Her sister is taking over for her. This is one of the most difficult parts of being ill, the constant changing of the homemaker. Some are great, some okay, some not so good, and it’s the good ones who seem to last the shortest amount of time. It’s a crap job anyway, doing other people’s laundry, cleaning other people’s bathrooms, grocery shopping which is not fun even when you’re doing it for your own family. They really aren’t paid very well, either, so it’s amazing anyone even chooses the job in the first place. I think it’s a ‘not enough skills or education for a better job’ kind of thing. But it would be nice to have the same person, if she’s a good cleaner, all the time. Starting over with someone new is hard, especially because of the nature of what they do for me. “Here’s my dirty laundry, new person. Deal with it.” I really hate that. You know how they say, “Be careful what you wish for?” I always wished someone else would clean the toilet, my least favorite job. Well, now someone does, but I am in pain and too fatigued to function and my brain doesn’t work well and my life has gotten more and more insulated and my world has shrunken…….but someone else cleans the toilet. A fair trade-off? I don’t think so. So that wishing thing is really a catch-22 kind of deal. A dirty trick the cosmos plays on you. Oh, well.